manic monday #211

well, i haven't done a manic monday post in quite some time, and i'm apparently inspired by new blog to write a bit more, so here i go meme-ing away.  questions from the manic monday blog, which is my favorite of the meme blogs.


1.  If you could only see black and white except for one color, what color would you choose to see?
have i answered this before?  i feel like i have.  i know it is a question i've thought about, because i asked it of my clients a few months ago.  that was pretty funny, and was a great moment of just being human together, because i heard responses of pink and purple and talk of sunsets from these supposedly thug-like, tough felons.  i've never seen them as stereotypes, but i think a lot of people lacking direct experience would be surprised by the very normal concerns, fears, and vulnerabilities that "ex-cons" recovering from mental illnesses that are pretty similar to those of the general population.  
anyway, for me, i would pick blue.  i think i could handle just bright white for the sun, but a gray sky on a sunny, puffy-cloud-scattered day like today would be too much to bear.


2.  If you could have a room full of any one thing, what would it be?  
should i be really pragmatic and just say money, because then i could use that to fill other rooms with lots of different stuff that i like?  i feel like that would kind of be breaking the rules, like using a wish to wish for unlimited wishes.  so i will try to come up with an actual thing i'd want a whole room's worth of.

my first thought was books, and i kind of do have a room full of those, but i could always get more.  i used to buy tons of books regularly and devour them voraciously, but i'm sort of sorry to say that i haven't bought a book in quite some time.  last summer i got into the habit of playing games on my iPhone to fall asleep instead of reading, and i didn't read much at all until a few months ago.  now i read before falling asleep, but i read books on my iPad.  the last five or six books i've read have been using an e-reader app on the iPad.  i hate the idea that so many have suggested of the death of print media with the dawn of online media, but i'm doing nothing to support the sustenance of the printed word.  it's cheaper and more efficient to download books, and reduces the use of resources to produce and transport paper books.  so, let's see, a room full of something other than books....

the next thing that came to mind was food, but that's basically a kitchen.  i have one of those already and don't find it particularly exciting.  i'm not a cosmo girl type who would enjoy a room full of shoes and handbags.  I KNOW!  a room full of apple products.  ginormous iMacs, MacBooks, mac minis, all permutations of color, size, and style of iPods, several iPhones and iPads for my various mobile moods, hundreds of backup accessories like power cords, headphones, and adapters,  airports to expand my network infinitely if i so choose-- oh boy, oh boy, i'm getting so excited just thinking how awesome it would be.  and i would definitely find a use for multiple units of the item, so having a whole room full of them would be in no way redundant.

3.  Imagine you could go back to the age of five and relive the rest of your life, knowing everything that you know now. You will reexperience your entire adolescence with both the cognitive ability of an adult and the memories of everything you’ve learned form having lived your life previously.
Would you lose your virginity earlier or later than you did the first time around (and by how many years)?
oh, golly, this is a tough one.  i am sort of opposed to regrets of any sort as far as the poor choices i may have made throughout my life, because whatever i've done in the past has been part of the aggregate of experience that has led to me being who i am in the present, and i really like who i am here and now.  so regrets are sort of empty calories as far as emotional energy goes.    
i was very young when i lost my virginity, too young by my adult standards.  that being said, the experience was not at all bad.  apart from being too young to really understand the meaning of being sexual and adult intimacy, it was about as good as young teen's first time can be.  particularly compared to the lost virginity horror stories i've heard, which seem to be the rule rather than the exception.  my boyfriend was very respectful, put absolutely zero pressure on me, participated fully in decisions about contraception and their implementation. so i honestly don't think i'd change a thing.    
the thing that kind of fucked me up as regards sex and relationships happened a couple months after i lost my virginity, did not involve consent or even being fully conscious, and would have happened whether i'd lost my virginity prior to that occasion or not.  i can't even say with absolute certainty that i would change that experience either.  i mean, i think i would, but i really am so, so, SO incredibly happy with my life right now that i don't think i want to fuck with the space-time continuum at all.  what if i ended up something horrible, like a PC user with a droid?